Exhausted...

Life's been rather exhausting lately. But I am not quite sure why I am more exhausted than I normally am... It seems like I cannot quite get past 2:30 or 3 without feeling like I am just going to fall over asleep. I am used to go, go, going and only getting a few hours of sleep. I think I may have depleted quite a few of my "banks" and am running below fumes...

There are a few med. 'people' I am supposed to go see and talk to... but I hate going and am procrastinating. Not a good thing... I know. Shame on me. I still haven't taken a test I totally forgot about...Double shame on me. I'm treading water trying to stay on top of everything else! (No excuses I know...).

On the up side... I've started running again. It's really addicting - I had forgotten how much I love it - once I get moving. It's a little bit of a meditation for me.  Right now I am running at home on the treadmill as it's so stinking hot outside. Apparently my pup (Moose- the Choc Lab) loves it too - he's so funny - he puts his front paws on the treadmill and "runs" along behind me! Mr Safety-Man videoed it but you can also see me (and it's not a pretty site) so we'll have to re-film him doing it! One of my goals for the last few years after getting my spine "fixed" is to run in a few races... the first being a 5k. I would REALLY like to run one of those to start... but after that who knows? I don't need to run a race - but really wanted a goal.

 It feels good to run again. I may need to increase the protein and eat a few more little meals. Perhaps that is why I am always so tired now-a-days?

Things just are not 'running' correctly right now...
I just think I need to do a major overhaul again with this body, mind, and spirit.

We made it! First Day of School 2011

We made it through the first week of school!
I've so much to catch up on here - but that will have to come soon... But I definitely wanted to get the photos of the girls up from their first day of school and their arrival home.

They both were a bundle of nerves the day before... it helped that we had a trek up to the airport to say goodbye to my parents (sniffle sniffle - I should say it was hard...but the distraction helped) and that we had a HOORAH to summer last fun activities planned for the day! Sweetpea came with me and we went to learn how to do a super neat "Twister" quilt (very cool way of doing 'pinwheels' in a table runner). And BooBooBear went with Daddy and got to go to the driving range!

Sweetpea did most of the sewing while Momma cut & helped

What a drive! 40yds...better than her momma!

I would have liked to do a "back to school dinner" and have a neat little evening discussing our "theme of the school year" an idea I loved from NieNie Dialogues blog and have been doing for a few years now. We did a really fun and good for you taco meal and discussed our theme, worries, excitement, questions, and what we did for our activity that day. It was a wonderful family evening.

We were all ready Monday! Sweetpea was excited and nervous for her first day in the "big" middle school. She came with Mr. Safety Man and me to drop off Boo. Boo was a little clingy and nervous but settled right in... after several "to do's before you leave Mommy"'s.  ("Mommy can you help me write my morning note, Mommy can you sharpen this pencil, Mommy can you help me empty my backpack) -it was hard to leave (I'd like to say on both of us... but I think more so on me) - but she's got the same teachers (2 years in this school) again this year - so she was ready and calm.

 It was good that we had to rush out and get Sweetpea over to her middle school. I think that helped me not feel sad to say goodbye to Boo. But I was nervous too. I still cannot believe my big, baby girl is in middle school. The three of us met our friends and followed them by car to the school - I think this helped Sweetpea a lot. She was really hoping to walk in with her bff and was able to! It was SO cute to see them walk in together.

Here they go

A little hand hold for comfort...

And there they go... 

I did Ok...a few little tears for me but Mr Safety Man was there and we were talking about all the details of the morning. I think the big kicker was the next day when she got out of the car and I was on my own after she got out with just a "Bye Mommy...(me:"have a good day") I WILL! (me: "I love you SWEETPEA") I love you too Mommy! BYE" and she was skipping off down the driveway. sigh. tear...tear... tear.

 

It was so neat to see them get off the bus after their first day's of school. I was really wondering how it all went... but their smiles and big hugs told me everything that I needed to know... 

Words to live by...

Just sayin'...

School Prep...

Ugh... I did it. I bit the bullet and did the school shopping and uniform shopping. I am so not happy with doing it. I wanted to stay in my SUMMER mode. DENIAL  that summer was coming to a close. But I did it. I spent a gazillion dollars on Sweetpea's new (gulp) middle school uniform. And than I spent another beaucoup bucks on supplies and a few more uniform pieces for BooBooBear... OH BOY... it hurt. A lot.  Not just because we spent so much money (although - that wasn't fun)... but I realized summer was almost over and I wouldn't have my girls all to myself anymore. It's becoming acutely obvious that I cannot avoid the fact that my first baby girl is growing up faster than I wanted her to...

I thought about sharing something she wanted to buy at the store - that just clinched it for me that she was getting so big - too fast. (But I think that one I'll just keep in the memory banks suffice it to say that she'd kill me if I wrote it out... hahaha).

I really wanted to do some more "learning" this summer with them, to keep them fresh. I know I am talking like the summer is completely over... and it's not.  I still want to have a lot more fun with my baby girls... and maybe do some reading and a little math... possibly some French in there as well! But if it doesn't get done... well I am deciding that I am still ok with it. Kiddos should be kiddos during the summer and I don't want them to lose that. We will still continue our reading and a little math etc here and there BUT...the last few weeks of summer  we're going to have fun just hanging out, playing, and doing fun things together.  We have our family vacation coming soon... that is ALWAYS the best time together as a family.

Hello August... I won't be sad of your arrival and what it means. 

I will embrace you and celebrate that it means to have the best 3 weeks before school.

I want to be with my girls for the rest of the summer and enjoy them.

Body Images...

Dear Kymmie's body,
I am very sorry.
I am sorry for what I put you through. I am sorry for the way I constantly find something to pick apart about how you look.

I am sorry for sucking my thumb until I was wayyyy too old and causing you to have braces that hurt your teeth not once, not twice, not three, not even four times... but FIVE... and stressing when I got them right before your wedding. Oh and grinding those teeth - from stressing - so they look like "man teeth". (And having what that dentist say hurt your feelings...)

I am sorry that I am so anxiety ridden that I take it out on you, so you feel that you have to produce eczema all over your face, ears, and head, get hives,  and get really bad tummy aches.

I am sorry I worry so much about what people think of you, if they like you, if you're too annoying - that you feel you are not worth anything.

I wish I took better care of your back and feet - you've survived three major spinal surgeries. It's not fair that you hurt every day one way or other & yet I still slouch...

I am sorry that my tension causes you to react and give such debilitating headaches you cannot move or think.

I am sorry that I abuse you by stopping to eat when I am anxious, stressed, or depressed. And I don't eat as well as I should when I do eat.

Sorry for talking smack about you...{blush}.

I am truly sorry that I just can't get out of my funk and that I take it all out on you.

I love you body. I love that you provided me with two beautiful children, that you hold such love for your family, that you truly care and adore your friends...That you sacrifice everything to deal with your family, friends and with all the demands that come your way.

I thank the Lord that He made you the way He did... and I will do better Kymmie's Body... I will.

Summer activities con't...

What else have we been up to?
Well - Sweetpea went on her very first EVER sleepover camping trip- the week after we got back from Maine. She was pooped and it was hard letting her go - but away she went.

 She. had. a. BLAST!

She got to go with her lil' bff - E. and they had a great time together. It was so good to see her when she got home however. Boy I missed that sweetheart. And BooBoo missed her big sister (although she won't admit it). But Boo and I played hard, went to parks, did some crafts, read books, watched movies, and snuggled... a lot.

We've boated, snorkeled (even BOO - who hated to put her face in the water last year!!!), watched fireworks glorious fireworks - watched with new friends. We've done lots of crafts, started our plans for a secret (shhhh) garden - complete with a bistro table and chair set), read, prepared fab dinners (and so much better for us), celebrated Daddy's day, played on fun playgrounds, played with friends, enjoyed the freedom of playing outside AND sleeping in, and last week I taught a week of sewing camp!!!

Both girls joined in the week of sewing camp and I think they did a good job of learning. Sweetpea was a HUGE help to me - like an assistant. But it was also hard on both girls because while doing sewing or crafts they are used to having my FULL attention and not sharing it with SEVEN other little girls. All-in-all we had a GREAT week. And the feedback so far I have received was positive!! I even got a few more sewing machines!!! And Mr Safety Man found me the DEAL OF THE CENTURY... I got a VIKING (slightly used) but the price was totally unbeatable!!!

My sewing campers!

Some big news... we also received an Etsy "convo" from a local store in Sarasota... she really liked what she saw in my Etsy shop and wanted us to put some creations in her store! SO we made the BIG decision and as of July 12, 2011 - we are now mArrineRs monTage - with an actual PHYSICAL location! We are super excited about this next step... but it has taken some MAJOR work to get ready. I just really hope something sells. Thank you to everyone that's been so supportive (even if you don't read this silly blog... hehehe).

The girls have been troopers the last few days - between doing some MAJOR overhauls in our rooms... organizing the house (MAJOR throw out as well...), trying on clothes, getting caught up on chores, shopping for the new store displays, and well... just boring stuff for kiddos... they have really shined. We spent DAYS working in their rooms and our bedroom - that have been neglected for MONTHS AND MONTHS. And the rooms are starting to turn around... still need a lot of help - but starting. Our girls both want to be "more responsible". The driving factor...they want to do 4H this Fall and take care of (pretend there's dramatic music - here - )... DUM DA DUMMMmmmm...

Bunnies!!

...oh boy...

Today after setting up 2 displays at MUSE GALLERIA - the store where we have mArrineRs monTage creations...I took them to a pet store and we got to pet bunnies, hold them and talk about what we could do etc. to be more responsible. Helping out and being active members of the family, became the topic of choice. It should be interesting to see where this goes. But our #1 goal is the responsibility factor... and keeping rooms clean, doing chores, saying their prayers, doing good works for others, reading and working on school type stuff for the next year (not in that order) - all falls in the  category of responsibility.

Love this girl...FACE in the water!!!

Love this girl

He's so cute...

yep that's me...& the girls...

Boo jumping! YIPPEE!

Projects girlies made

Yummmy dinner my honey made...

Anyway...  I digress... I guess in retrospect we have had QUITE a full summer thus far... tomorrow we are meeting some friends at the beach and just relaxing... That will be super nice. I am really looking forward to catching up and watching our kiddos frolicking in the waves...

I guess that is what summer is about... to stop having such high expectations and to really just relax, enjoy, let good times and good memories just come. To release what "HAS" to happen and just let things happen. The girls will remember different things about the summer - but what is important to me - is that they remember ME (and of course Mr Safety Man too) being there... being an ACTIVE part of their summer with them. I want them to look back and think - I had a lot of fun with my Mommy this summer. We get to be together... and honestly - if you know me - that means more to me now than it ever has before...

That is ultimately what matters right?