We made it! First Day of School 2011

We made it through the first week of school!
I've so much to catch up on here - but that will have to come soon... But I definitely wanted to get the photos of the girls up from their first day of school and their arrival home.

They both were a bundle of nerves the day before... it helped that we had a trek up to the airport to say goodbye to my parents (sniffle sniffle - I should say it was hard...but the distraction helped) and that we had a HOORAH to summer last fun activities planned for the day! Sweetpea came with me and we went to learn how to do a super neat "Twister" quilt (very cool way of doing 'pinwheels' in a table runner). And BooBooBear went with Daddy and got to go to the driving range!

Sweetpea did most of the sewing while Momma cut & helped

What a drive! 40yds...better than her momma!

I would have liked to do a "back to school dinner" and have a neat little evening discussing our "theme of the school year" an idea I loved from NieNie Dialogues blog and have been doing for a few years now. We did a really fun and good for you taco meal and discussed our theme, worries, excitement, questions, and what we did for our activity that day. It was a wonderful family evening.

We were all ready Monday! Sweetpea was excited and nervous for her first day in the "big" middle school. She came with Mr. Safety Man and me to drop off Boo. Boo was a little clingy and nervous but settled right in... after several "to do's before you leave Mommy"'s.  ("Mommy can you help me write my morning note, Mommy can you sharpen this pencil, Mommy can you help me empty my backpack) -it was hard to leave (I'd like to say on both of us... but I think more so on me) - but she's got the same teachers (2 years in this school) again this year - so she was ready and calm.

 It was good that we had to rush out and get Sweetpea over to her middle school. I think that helped me not feel sad to say goodbye to Boo. But I was nervous too. I still cannot believe my big, baby girl is in middle school. The three of us met our friends and followed them by car to the school - I think this helped Sweetpea a lot. She was really hoping to walk in with her bff and was able to! It was SO cute to see them walk in together.

Here they go

A little hand hold for comfort...

And there they go... 

I did Ok...a few little tears for me but Mr Safety Man was there and we were talking about all the details of the morning. I think the big kicker was the next day when she got out of the car and I was on my own after she got out with just a "Bye Mommy...(me:"have a good day") I WILL! (me: "I love you SWEETPEA") I love you too Mommy! BYE" and she was skipping off down the driveway. sigh. tear...tear... tear.

 

It was so neat to see them get off the bus after their first day's of school. I was really wondering how it all went... but their smiles and big hugs told me everything that I needed to know... 

Blue

The skies are certainly blue. I love being able to see it. The sun does help me warm up - I just wish my mood wasn't so blue. Why? Why do I feel the way I feel? It is frustrating and heartbreaking.

We had a WONDERFUL and I mean WONDERFUL Spring Break. I cannot wait to post photos! We were really in our element. It was SO good to be together as a family. I love our time together. I truly, truly do. 

Families are forever.

I believe that with all my heart.

It was so fun together. We had a TERRIFIC week!  But then it rained the last day. We had to leave a bit earlier - not my choice. And it hit...our wonderful Disney World passes that I didn't think were even obtainable when we actually got them - until they were in our hot little hands- are expiring at the end of this month. There is no renewing them... not this year. Not with the year we've had. It's too bad. I really love going to Disney World. I know how lucky we were to be able to get our annual passes. I love to see my little, sweet girls' faces when go on a ride or show they love. I love that my oldest (11yrs old) still lights up that Minney Mouse waved to her.."She looked right at me Mommy and WAVED!!!".  It's been such a blessing to help us get a through a really tough time. A time I am sorry to say that is never gone. It's always lurking in the shadows of my mind. I think I am doing better though. sometimes. Is it funny to say that going to Disney has helped?

But I guess I'm down for a variety of reasons. Only I can't shake them. I want to lie down and throw the covers over my head and not move. I feel things are not controllable - and that is hard for me. I see my Sweetpea and she is growing up fast - but still a little girl. She is trying so hard to figure out who she is... then it hits... She'll be in Middle School next year. And I don't want that. But I do. I don't want to lose my first born baby...not that I am losing her... but the "baby" I am. I pray that she will still be my sweet girl. But we know Middle school age stereotypes...don't we? I pray she will be like me and my mom were. I never thought my mom was "queer" (yes... it was the 80's y'all). I never was embarrassed to hug her in front of my friends. I was a bit unique I guess. But I adored (still do) my mom and dad. I just pray I have that with both my girls. They are such snuggle-y wonders to me. How did I receive such a gift - twice? Such blessings?

I am sad. Yes. I will work through it and try to be more "me". Yes. Remembering that what is important is right here with me and beside me... crawling in to bed with me the last few days, weeks, months - still to wipe away bad dreams and telling me that they love me. THAT is what will help me defeat these awful feelings.
Yes.

I will somehow triumph. yes.

Love her...

We had a wonderful visit with Nana "de" Blanche! It makes me happy to see her again....and my babies adore her. When she first arrived Monday AM... my girls had no idea... they were so shocked... Sweetpea was SPEECHLESS!!! BooBooBear was absolutely shocked she didn't know what to do... It was wonderful. We surprised them at school for Effort Honor Roll. Both girls enjoyed showing off to their Nana how well they've done in school!! We are all super proud of the job they've done in school!

We truly relaxed all week - no major projects this time around, no set agenda. Just visiting, enjoying time together, shopping, just being with no crazy schedule. It was FANTASTIC. I was trying to think what day was my favorite... Nana running off the tram to give me a hug & the surprise and happiness of my girls seeing her, or shopping around Crowder's.... NOPE has to be running around on the beach in rainy weather! Carrying umbrellas -  watching the girls running in the rain - trying to take photos was so much fun!

A very sweet week.
Thank you for everything Nana "de" Blanche...

I absolutely love, love, love this shot... so sweet!!!

Another lovely one...

Glad I have you Blanchey!

It got chilly REALLY quickly...

And rather windy too!

Then again... the pajama party was awful fun too...

"Bigges HUG evahhhhhh"

Ever since BooBooBear was able to talk she would always ask for hugs. Heck since she was a tiny infant she wanted to give me hugs... These are those heartfelt...squeezes. The ones that you just do not want to stop. I LOVE my kiddos' snuggles... I just love them. We are an affectionate family and I just love to snuggle up to my babes.

Sometimes BooBooBear would continue until you really would have to extricate yourself - to get things done. Sometimes I would fall asleep in that comfortable embrace. And sometimes I would say... "that's not as much as a hug as yesterday..." - to which she would reply... "Do you want a biggah hug?"and then she would squeeze me as hard as she could.

Thus the birth of "tha Bigges...HUG... EVAHhhhhhhhhs"... It would happen so often... Starting with the familiar question...

Boo: "Ma-me (mommy), do you wan tha bigges hug EVAH?" (gradually getting louder as said)
Me: "ooo of course I do!"
And then the huge hug (well for a little toddler) and sometimes it would continue to...
Boo: "o I can do anuddah one bettah" and
Me: "OK let's see"
So it would be almost nightly - and before naps too...really whenever she needed a squeeze & a squish.

My Bigges Hugs Evah's  continued through many years... then suddenly were forgotten or stopped this past year. BooBoo didn't stop hugging. No, she just stopped giving me giant huge hugs labeled has BHEs (which were actually getting REALLY strong and I would have to ready myself for them). I hadn't really forgotten my special hugs - but had. Life was hard and busy this year. Until recently I didn't even notice they had stopped.

Then suddenly - just as suddenly as they had stopped, and as I realized I was missing them, they started back up again last weekend...

Boo: "Momma do you want the  "bigges hug EVAH?" (gradually getting louder as said)
Me: "ooo of course I do!" "You haven't done one of these in FOREVERrrrrrrr!!"
Boo: "WHAT?" (the way Boo says that phrase is another whole post in itself)
"REALLY?? Hmmmm"
And then the huge hug (and this time was HUMONGOUS) and then continued to...
Boo: "o I can do anathah one bettah wanna see?"
Me: "OK let's see"
And sure enough... it was bigger, and BETTER.

Tha Bigges HUG EVAHHHhhhhhh are Mommy's special hugs... something just between my baby girl and me and I cherish them and hope they never end.
I missed those hugs and am so glad they are back!!!

Ta Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa (only with photos of it COMPLETE on Boo!)

Oh my goodness... oh my goodness (quote from Annie)!!! I am really thrilled with how these beautiful ruffle pants for BooBooBear turned out! She tried them on (after I had to do some adjusting... they were a bit long for her...she's 8 and I made the size 10...) and I am just in love! Now don't get me wrong... there are mistakes... oh yeah MANY mistakes I had to fix... - but I learned with each one of them and hope to only get better!!!

I REALLY want a pair all to myself... I am RUFFLE CRAZY now!! (LOVE my ruffle foot for my sewing machine... truly I do - it's a match made in heaven!!!)!!!
OK without further ado... Here is Boo in her new owl... ruffle... Rosie Posie (by PinkFig - love her! Thank you so much Chelsea!) pants!!

Close up of the ruffles (excuse the cord - it was hard getting her off her PC game!)

THERE SHE IS! WOW looking STUNNING! (and the pants are so cute too!!)

Don't you just love how she poses for her Rosie Posie ruffle pant photo?

"Now a sitting photo Momma!"

 And there ya go...I am so happy with how they came out! I am very proud of myself! My first pair of pants ever!! But most of all... BooBooBear is happy as can be - and that is all that matters!!!

My Valentine...Day 1 POST SCRIPT

So i go in to kiss Boo goodnight and she has her Couette (Coo-ette-French for blanket - she pronounces COO-yette - her blankie) over face.

I ask her what's wrong... and she pulls Couette off her face, looks at me directly in my eyes and says...

"Mame - I am going to stop suckin' my thwumb.

I said a pwayer and I won't suck my thwumb"

I said and did God answer? And I looked at her face and she wiped the side of her eye.

"Are you crying Boo Boo? What's wrong?"...

"HAPPY TEARS MAME... These are HAPPY TEARS! Happy, happy Tears Mame"

I want to not suck my thumb for your birthday"

So now Mommy's heart is just OVER POURING... just absolutely filled... and now Mommy is crying HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY proud tears.

HAPPY 7th BIRTHDAY Little Boo! 7/27/02

I just cannot believe she's 7! It went by so fast. I held her tiny little form when she was born and wondered at the miracle placed on me. How could I be so lucky and blessed? She was strong and continues to be strong. She is a fighter, a leader, independent, and mine.

Why does time soar along so fast? I held her tightly, caressing her and loving her tiny little form. Loving how she fit in my arms. I blinked. She changed. She is no longer my tiny baby - but she is so big & strong, beautiful, growing and changing so fast. I am afraid to blink again. I am afraid I will miss something of this small, little wonder. I am afraid that she will blossom and change so fast that my heart will not grow with her.

how little you were...

Ahhh time is a funny thing. But time does give us blessings of watching the wonder of the world through their eyes. And seeing all the miracles of their becoming "themselves". So special. So sacred.

My baby... my tiny little Boo... seven. When did it happen?

Happy birthday sweet Boo Boo Bear... Happy Birthday to my baby, always.

Musings on how time can just go by so fast...